Monday, May 08, 2006

My daughter smokes (Yes, it is the title of an Alice Walker Essay)

Oh My God I cannot believe that the tiny red headed freckly baby is a smoker. I am so angry about this that I am almost incandescent. I finally gave up two years ago after fifteen years of smoking thirty a day. It was hellish but I did it. My daughter hated me smoking. She loathed the smell and my stained teeth and hands. She also has asthma. So why is she smoking now? It can only be peer pressure. Her new college friends smoke in clubs at weekends and she wants to be like them? When I ask her she shrugs and smirks and tells me I am making too much of it. I don't get it.

Alice Walker's fabulous Essay "My Daughter Smokes" in her collection Living by the Word is in part an exploration of the politics of smoking and the pain of watching your child inhale toxins and carcinogens; it also gives a short account of her father's death from pneumonia and his battle with bronchitis and emphysema. I shall be making my daughter sit down and read it. It will mean nothing to her and she will think I am stupid. I wish I could do better on her behalf but I can't. The smoker's need for a cigarette will nearly always overwhelm any common sense desire to quit. I used to long for a cigarette so much that I would be able to convince myself that I was actually warding off disease with the smoke. It is a vicious addiction and I despair for my daughter and her fine young skin and her compromised lungs.

36 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi,

I too have a daughter who smokes. My wife has smoked during our marriage of nearly 15 years and both myself and my daughter used to hate this. We use to break up her cigarettes or hide them from her. My daughter hated the smell of it and would never go near an ashtray. Imagine my despair when I found that my daughter too has decided to 'turn to the dark side' and start something she found so disgusting and repulsive. Lately she has even forgotten how much it smelled and how much she hated it. I feel like I've lost my friend and now I find her just as disgusting as my wife, sometimes it breaks my heart to see her smoking.

Pippa said...

Hi back to you! I'm so sorry that your daughter smokes. I am sorry too that you find her disgusting. Do your family know how you feel? Can you talk to them?

You haven't lost your friend! She is the same person but now she has an addiction.

My daughter has now stopped smoking (to my knowledge!!) Here's my strategy: I nagged and nagged about it...I never let my daughter have a guilt free cig. I filled the bathroom bedroom and lounge with anti-smoking literature. I appealed to her on the level of political awareness, the sacredness of the tobacco plant, human rights abuses in cig. production etc.
I begged her. I told her I love her and I don't want her to die a horrible painful death by drowning, which is what lung cancer essentially is.
Don't give up on her. Keep pestering her even when she gets aggressive (and she will!) This will prove to her that you love her enought to risk her loathing you!
I hope you come back and read this, I hope you let me know what happens. I'm thinking of you! Pippa x

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your advice. In hindsight maybe I shouldn't have said that I find my daughter disgusting, it's not her, it's what she does. I don't know if I'm able to nag at her because 1. I just get my wife nagging back at me (as I've said my wife smokes too). 2. I'm stupid enough to buy them for my daughter (even though it breaks my heart), I've tried dropping little hints to her, such as her breath smells and such but she's oblivious to everything now. It's like my little daughter who used to complain about smoking (like yours did) has been replaced by another person, she just seems to have forgotten what she used to be like.

The question is, because I've kept my feelings to myself for the last few months, am I right to suddenly change. I only let her smoke in the house and in front of me because I hoped she would open up and tell me why she started smoking in the first place (stupid I know) which, being a teenager, she never did. At the time, I was also getting back at my wife who didn't like my daughter smoking (even though she does it herself). I don't know if I'm in a position now to be telling her that I don't like what she's doing after buying her cigarettes for her and allowing her to smoke.

At least I now know I'm not the only one going through this.

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Hello! No you aren't the only one! And yes, I think its okay to suddenly and loudly (!!) change tack. You have new information, you have new feelings about smoking that make it all different. You can stop buying the fags. You are entitled to stand up and protect your family and yourself from the smoke!! I think you can tell them what you wrote here, just put it like that and really stress how much you love them both...or if you don't want to do that, tell them how much money they will save. Its huge amounts!!
Please don't give up, you sound intelligent and caring, you can do it! Just trying to help is a positive move and whether she shows it or not, it really will register with your daughter that her dad is so interested and involved.

Best, Pippa x

Anonymous said...

Hi, my name is Jessica. I am a mother of three wonderful daughters. They are 21, 20, and 16. I am 48 and i have been smoking for almost thrity years. I am now divorced, but my husband still nags me to quit because of our youngest daughter Ashley.

The oldest two daughters have never been smokers. They think that smoking is disgusting. I do not blame them, and I am thrilled this is the way that they feel. When my youngest daughter Ashley was 15 I started noticing my cigarettes were missing and that she was coming home smelling more and more like smoke. I do understand that she could have friends that smoke so I had to believe her. Then one day i was going through her purse because i needed a femine product (sorry but im puting in details) and right when i found the tampon and maxi pad i saw a pack of cigarettes. I now had realised my daughter smoked. Instead of confronting her right away I waited. I checked her purse everyday and found the same type of cigarettes with less or more than the day before. When I picked her up from school one day she smelled of smoke. I then decided to tell her i knew she smoked and that she probably had a pack of camel lights in her purse. She confessed she was a smoker and that she had been for almost a year.

I did not let her smoke because she is my kid and I make the rules. She even convinced me she quit until I came into her room to ask her something and she was lying in bed and her clothes smelt of smoke, so i searched through her room and found about 5 empty packs and a almost full carton.

i then had a talk with her and explained that i knew she was addicted, and that she could now smoke. I have never been closer to her and i am sure your wife feels the same way. You should take your disciplinary action against your daughter but if she is addicted like mine is there is nothing we can do.

Anonymous said...

hi jessica,
i have a similar story to yours. i have three daughters as well. my oldest is 23 and i have two twin girls that are now 17.
my oldest daughter has been a smoker for almost 7 years. i am not a smoker but i did not find out she was smoking until she was about to move away to college and she had been a smoker for 2 years by then, so there was nothing i could do.
my two twins are still in high school but when they had just turned 16 i had suspected one if not both were possibly smoking. i would search their rooms inside and out. especially my daughter rachel's room. she is a partyer and out of the two i suspected her the most.
i would even ask my oldest daughter and she would not give up who it was but she said that one of them was smoking. so i knew i was on to something.
i was cleaning out my daughter christy's bathroom and when i was straightening up her tampon/maxi pad drawer i found a pack of cigarettes. i tore her room apart and found a couple of lighters and empty packs and an ashtray on her balcony.
i heard her open her balcony later that night and walked in and saw her smoking. we had a long talk about at one point we were both crying and i was so shocked she would smoke she doesnt seem like person who would smoke.
after about 8 months of catching her and grounding her i gave up on the power struggle and realised she was not going to quite.
it still kills me to see her smoke and clean out her ashtrays, but no matter what she is my daughter and she is a smoker, and i have had to accept it. it is one of the hardest things in the world being a non smoking mother and have two of your three daughters sitting their smoking right in front of you and see that they have no idea what they are doing to themselves and not even realising how addicted to cigarettes they are.
i understand what you have done by giving in and letting your daughter smoke because it is something that is very hard to break.

Pippa said...

Hello! Thanks for commenting. I hope you can continue to help your daughters find a way to stop smoking. It is sooo painful for us to watch our kids do damage to themselves. We remember all the protection we gave them, the care we took and it just annoys the crap out of us! I would ban smoking in the house though, just coz I'm picky and I hate the smell. Make it difficult for them to keep it up! Good luck to you. Pippa x

dad loves his girls said...

It's absolutely normal, addiction doesn't take long, the habit will continue to grow, and the whole world has known her as a smoker for years, are you the last to know?? Accept it, stress less, eat less junk, weight control, social acceptance, looking sexy are all valid reasons. Thirty percent of teen girls smoke daily. I bet another 30% smoke secretly. This is very common. Embrace her, she is your normal teenage daughter.

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